My daughter is trying out for travel league soccer. This is a big deal to her; it's the first time she's had to take a risk of being rejected. It's a big deal for us too, it costs $1500 and is a 10 month commitment including weekly practices (two), strength training, and Parisi (Speed training). Youth sports has changed a lot since I played! Anyway, my daughter has been very nervous about it even though we've told her all that matters is that she does her best. Because of her jitters, I made a commitment to her that I would be there for all the tryout sessions even though it means I have to leave work early.
Today was session #2 and wouldn't you know it, we had a major issue at work that required my attention and was going to run well into the evening. After seeing my daughter in session #1 I wasn't all that concerned as she picked up some confidence, so I considered calling home to see if it would be OK that I didn't make it. Then as I though about it, I decided "No, I made a commitment and I'm going to keep it".
I told my boss that I was going to have to leave for a little while but that I would be willing to come back. He wasn't thrilled, but he agreed to cover for me and in the end I didn't have to go back because the issue got resolved without me.
On my way to soccer I started to think about just how easy it was to keep this commitment to my daughter, and I wondered why it's so hard for me to keep commitments to myself. What's the difference? A commitment is a commitment right?
I guess part of the answer has to do with it being OK to disappoint yourself but not OK to disappoint others. No, that doesn't seem right. Maybe it's because you're the only one who knows about the commitment so it's OK. No that doesn't seem right either.
I think the problem is this... Maybe when we make a commitment to ourselves, we really don't consider it a real commitment. Might sound crazy, but for me, at least, I think that's my problem. To me personal commitments don't feel like real commitments that I make to others.
So I guess I need to start thinking about those commitments as real; maybe then I can do a better job keeping my commitments to myself and not ending up disappointed.
Stay Strong!
I totally have this struggle too. Like when I was pregnant I ate perfectly, for my babies. But I can't do it for me.
ReplyDeleteWe Mamas always want to take care of everyone else, don't we? And our health suffers. I blogged just the other day about the secret to getting healthy and losing weight: it's being a little selfish.
ReplyDeleteAny commitment is best made with eyes and sometimes ears wide open.
ReplyDeleteWhen taking on any commitment the road it may lead us along could be bumpy but we should stay on it, unless of course it causes ill health or ill feelings.
Do hope your daughter enjoys her soccer.
All the best Jan
Any commitment is best made with eyes and sometimes ears wide open.
ReplyDeleteWhen taking on any commitment the road it may lead us along could be bumpy but we should stay on it, unless of course it causes ill health or ill feelings.
Do hope your daughter enjoys her soccer.
All the best Jan