About Fogdog's Weight Loss

STARTING OVER (AGAIN)...

Through failure we learn to succeed! This is a blog about fighting back. It's about picking yourself up off the floor, dusting yourself off, and getting right back in there. It's about holding yourself accountable, having the right mindset, and learning to live a healthy lifestyle.

I have failed more times than I can count. I've reached a point in my life where I've decided that giving up is no longer an option. I've decided to devote 360 days toward my health and well being in the hopes that I can turn my life around.

Join me as I take the journey and try to stay on the path. Learn from me through my successes and failures, and help me learn from you. As one blog I am weak, but as a community we are very strong. Let's Succeed Together!

Tuesday, January 6, 2015

Day #2 - A tough realization and a dose of reality

I never really thought of myself as one of those extremely overweight people.  I’ve been big my whole life but I always managed to be able to do the things I wanted; my weight didn’t really slow me down.  I remember when biggest loser came on and I made a comment to my wife about how big those contestants were.  She turned and said to me (not in a mean way) “you’re almost as big as they are!”  It was kind of surprising to hear that… I never really saw myself as morbidly obese.  It might sound weird but I always just considered myself a little overweight and I always believed I carried my weight well.

As I look back now I realize that it was more about me lying to myself so I wouldn’t have to admit that I had a problem.  I refused to accept that I couldn’t lose weight, I refused to accept that my eating was out of control.  I was only slightly overweight and all I needed was about 6 months of hard work to pull myself into shape.  I could do it anytime because I had the mental fortitude to take on such a task and I was physically strong so I could keep my metabolism revved and lose the weight quickly.

I think I started to accept reality when I turned 40 (2 years ago).  At close to 350 pounds I was morbidly obese.  I could be any one of those contestants on “The Biggest Loser”.  Over the last couple years I haven’t been able to do all the things I want.  I’ve withdrawn more and more from life as I spend a lot of time hanging out on the couch watching TV.  There have been some times in this past 2 years where I simply gave up and stopped trying to lose weight and stopped monitoring my progress.

This is my new reality… I could literally lose 150 pounds and still be at a healthy weight.  My skin will never go all the way back.  I don’t “carry” my weight well and there’s nothing special about me that makes me any better off than others of my size.  I am morbidly obese!

Day 2 really had me thinking about just how big I am and how poor of shape I am in.  I had another great day with my eating plan and with drinking water.  Knowing that not smoking is taking a lot out of me I know that it would be extremely difficult to find the strength to exercise at the end of the day, so again today I went for a walk during my lunch hour.  It snowed last night so walking outside wasn’t going to work, so I drove over to the mall and walked there.

It was a little uncomfortable for me to walk at the mall, but It was my only option.  I walked 4 full laps around the mall which ended up being almost 3 miles in about 50 minutes!  I’m proud that I walked again today even though it is what is reminding me about just how out of shape I am.  After just 3 miles of walking my knees hurt, my back hurt, and my feet hurt.  By the time I got back to my vehicle I could feel my fingers beginning to swell a little (not sure why).

By the time I got back to work I was beginning to feel stiff and sore everywhere… all from just a 3 mile walk at lunchtime.  Indeed I still have a long way to go!  Another plus, I was smoke free again today.  All in all it was pretty good day.  As predicted I was too wiped out when I got home to do anymore exercise so I’m glad I got it in during the day.  I had to cook dinner so I made fajitas for the kids and then a fajita salad for me since I can’t have carbs today.  Tomorrow is my first high carb day and I’m excited to have some fruit!  2 days in the books and 358 more to go!

-Stay Strong!

5 comments:

  1. I'm the same, I always kid myself that I'm not really that big. Until I see myself in a full length mirror! There is that uncomfortable point on Biggest Loser when the contestants are smaller than you are but still have a long way to go.

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  2. I found that acceptance of reality was a good first step for me. Then a cunning plan to 'do something' but being open to revise the plan thinking about what worked and what didn't. It wasn't quick, and I won't pretend it was always easy (still isn't at times) but the benefits are absoluitely HUGE in ways I never even considered when I first set out to lose the fat suit. Good going on that mall walking when you couldn't get outside. Good luck with it and keep on keepin' on!

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  3. What you describe in the first two paragraphs was me for the longest time. Since I aboided the scale, I could delude myself easier into thinking I wasn't as bad off....boy, did reality sink in once I finally "saw" the truth. Way to go on the walking and containing smoke free. Keep it going!

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  4. Good for you even small steps at getting back in shape is a good thing.

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  5. Um, my knees, shoulders and back hurt after walking about a 100 feet or less. No lie, I am that out of shape. FD, walking 3 miles at lunch is impressive. To think you are just starting makes it even more so. Keep going, it will all be worth it.

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