Yesterday I asked the question "Have I really changed toward healthy living or am I still making excuses"? 68 days ago I gave myself 3 goals to meet; Quit Smoking, Quit Drinking Alcohol, and Lose 100 Pounds. At Day 69 I have only succeeded at one of those goals.
After some soul searching today I think I've reached an answer to my question but it's not a simple yes or no. I HAVE changed, I've thought about healthy living every single day of this journey so far. I AM committed to becoming healthier, and I know this really isn't optional anymore; I NEED to change. However, I've also been making excuses lately. I've been riding the "Quit Smoking" train for all that it has been worth and I've used that as justification to keep drinking and to not eat healthy.
Even as I put forth effort to stop drinking, I started to use that as an excuse to eat poorly, and then when I started to eat better, I used that as an excuse to let go a little and drink one night.
So when I ask myself if I've changed, I know the answer is yes because I can see the excuses for what they are. I can look into the mirror and tell myself that this week was a wasted week; that I had a week of vacation away from the stress (my biggest excuse) and yet somehow I managed to eat poorly and drink alcohol (and as a result gain 1.5 pounds). I can tell myself that it was a wasted week but at the same time I can put it behind me and renew my commitment. I don't have to spend another week depressed about last week.
However, change is not enough, I need to add some resolve and I need to make a few adjustments
The first thing on my agenda is to view my progress based on all my goals. No more riding the "no smoking" train, if I'm not smoking, not drinking, and eating healthy, then I am being successful. Success in one does not give me justification to give in to temptation in another area.
Second, no more drinking on the weekends. I'm a recreational drinker, but I've noticed that the recreational drinking ends up hurting my resolve when it comes to eating healthy. The two are tied together; I cannot lose weight and be healthy if I continue to drink.
Lastly, I need to strive for more consistency. It's amazing how quickly I swing from one extreme to the other, one day I can be perfect and the next day I'm completely off the rails for the entire day. I need to work on keeping steady. It would be better if I was consistently doing and average job than to be constantly alternating between great and terrible.
So here I am at a crossroads. I can continue to make excuses or I can learn from my mistakes and push forward. The decision is an easy one to make; despite the ups and downs I have made progress and it would be a shame to stop here. Besides, I've said it a few times. Failure is no longer an option, I NEED to make these changes. Day #69 is in the books, on to Day #70
Stay Strong!
P.S.- Happy PI Day!
FD we might be twin, it's like you are in my head and I hear you loud and clear. The best thing I did is STOP drinking, and I was not a recreational drinker I was pretty much drinking every day. This was preventing me to focus on my health, once "feeling good" I would not care about what I was eating, and exercise was out of the question. So many times I turn the 180, so many times my vehicle would end up back on the reverse direction after getting flood in alcohol. This was depressing and having me drink more. Before stopping, I was doing good but it will not have last, I NEED to stop because I NEED to get healthy!
ReplyDeleteI have been following you for a month, every post so far, I felt you were not commit, you really wanted to get healthy, but you were not taking control over your mind. You were going with the flow, accepting defeat too easy.
Today, I'm so excited for you, I believe your turn around is on day 69 and you are moving forward. Have faith in yourself, let the needs be your guidance, dismiss your wants and desires.
Commit to get fit and healthy ...... small steps at a time that progress to big steps, when you look back and see the progress you can (and do) make.
ReplyDeleteAll the best Jan
Slow and steady wins the race! Keep pushing forward!
ReplyDelete