Gee I don’t know, I was kind of hoping that in the process of keeping to my promises, I thought maybe I would feel better. Unfortunately, how I’m doing isn’t exactly the same as how I feel. While I’m doing great focusing on living a healthy lifestyle, I absolutely feel like garbage at the moment. I’m depressed, I have no ambition to do much and I’m struggling to find motivation to do anything other than keep to my promises about my health.
Fortunately for me, I recognize how I feel and I know that it’s only temporary. Making changes in your lifestyle often trigger moods and I know that I just need to keep pushing through until I feel better. I know that quitting smoking brings out the worst in me and the last time I quit I was told by someone that they liked me better as a smoker. I’ve made it a point to not use my lack of smoking as an excuse to be a jerk.
We all have a limited amount of mental fortitude each day and mine is at its limit. Between eating right, exercising, quitting smoking, and not being a jerk about it all, I just simply don’t have much left each day. I’m OK with that because I know it is temporary. It’s already getting easier to exercise each day and the cigarette cravings have begun to subside. I know that soon enough I’ll have a little more energy to burn and it will allow me to do more. I just got to ride it out until I feel better.
It’s this mindfulness of my feelings that gives me hope that this time will be different. I still don’t believe in myself yet, but I hope that also changes with time.
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So far I haven’t mentioned much about my alcohol
consumption. Typically I’m a weekend
drinker so clearly I’m nervous as we come into my first weekend. Mrs. FogDog and I agreed to abstain this
weekend but we’ve said that before and ended up drinking on Saturday
night. Come to think of it, we’ve said
that before and ended up drinking on BOTH Friday and Saturday night. To be honest, I’m sort of glad for the crappy
mood because I don’t really feel like drinking.
I might not get anything else done this weekend but at least I’ll be
sober in the process.
You would think I would be looking forward to the weekend,
but I’m more nervous about the weekend than I am the work week. During the work week there’s not a lot of
idle time. Between the job and carting
the kids around too their activities
there’s not a lot of opportunity to get myself in trouble. Not true with the weekend. We have a basketball game on Saturday
afternoon but other than that my weekend is wide open. I told Mrs. FogDog she should put together a
list of things she needs me to do so I can keep myself occupied. Otherwise, I could end up on the couch all
weekend stuffing my face with things I shouldn’t.
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Another successful day;
I didn’t smoke and kept to my eating plan and also met my water
goal. I didn’t go to the mall to walk at
lunchtime and
Day 5 is in the books, time to face my first weekend and a weigh-in tomorrow morning! On to Day #6.
-Stay Strong!
